Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
