I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
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