Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
