Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
