You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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