i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
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I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
