after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
