Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
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