I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
And then he peed in my hair
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
