Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
