she was so not down for the gang bang
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Randomize