i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
