i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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