were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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