Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize