So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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