Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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