its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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