I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
You ate ashes out of my bong
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
