Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Randomize
