Don't you send me to vm
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Who put my cat in the fridge?
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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