i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
this is an emotional support booty call
Help me help you realize you are a moron
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
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