I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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