Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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