Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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