fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
Randomize
