Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Two ladies just showed up with my fucking purse. It was in the fucking street. I'm a train wreck. As a financial advisor, this shouldn't happen. I should be an adult.
I have bruises all over my body. Seriously, I'm a train wreck. I'm too damn old for hangovers like this.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
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