Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
