if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
