You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
