I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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