The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
