____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize