Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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