my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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