How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Randomize
