cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
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I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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