Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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