explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize
