I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
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