If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
