i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
