Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
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