she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Randomize
