I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Randomize
