everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Randomize
