My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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