3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Randomize
