I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
