The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize
