I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
