This girl is more easily done than said...
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
